I was delighted and honored when my friend Amy asked me to join along in the series of posts about writing that have been circulating around the blogosphere lately. I discovered Amy’s blog, My Path with Stars Bestrewn, a couple of months ago, and I instantly fell in love with her writing. Some of the very first words of Amy’s I ever read were these: “We don’t have to look too far to find opportunities to share love. Opportunities are right here, right now. The only prerequisite is a pair of eyes to see and a heart willing to give.” This last sentence is, in short, what Amy’s writing does for me: it opens my eyes, it opens my heart.
“Had I been blessed with even limited access to my own mind there would have been no reason to write. I write entirely to find out what I’m thinking, what I’m looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear. “ –Joan Didion
What am I working on?
What you read on this blog is what there is. Occasionally, my posts will appear elsewhere, but these are all posts that have, at least up until now, appeared here first. In other words, I have no big plans up my sleeve. I’ve only been writing (regularly) for about a year and a half, so I still consider myself to be in the childhood of my writing life. In Still Writing, Dani Shapiro talks about “writing in the dark,” or the period of time when a writer is just starting out and there are no labels, no good or bad reviews, and no expectations to encumber her. “In the dark,” she writes, “you are free to grow like a moon flower, to experiment without consequences. There are no limits, no definitions.” This is the sacred space in which I see myself. I think that, ultimately, I would like to write a book, possibly a memoir, but I’m also being intentionally protective of this present time. I don’t feel a need to push or rush anything. Right now, I’m finding my voice. I’m discovering what I want to say and how I want to say it. I’m letting myself take chances, grow like a moon flower.
How does my work differ from others of its genre?
I’m not sure I have a good answer for this one. First of all, I’m not exactly sure what my “genre” is. Yes, I’m a blogger. Yes, I’m a mother. But I don’t think of myself as a “mommy blogger.” I think that the main, and perhaps the only, way that my work differs is that it is written by me. It is therefore entirely at the mercy of my sensibility. I am an only child of divorced parents. I was born and raised in suburban Los Angeles. I attended a small liberal arts college on the East Coast where I met the man I would eventually marry. I pursued a career as a professional actress for a time. I am the mother of three children. I have chosen to raise these three children thousands of miles away from where I was raised, both literally and figuratively. All of these life experiences are a factor in my writing because they are a factor in me. They have formed, and continue to form, my unique lens on the world. This lens is the only tangible difference I can see.
Why do I write what I do?
What I have learned over the years is that when I am not writing, I feel like a central valve has been sealed, my blood flow constricted, essential parts of me gangrene and wither. There is also, when I am not writing, the unnerving feeling that I am hiding from myself, which in essence I am doing, since I am unable to think through even the smallest matters unless I write them down.
I wrote these sentences back in November and every word of them is still true. I write to create some sense of order around my experience. I write to stay engaged in my life. I write to know how I am feeling and what I am thinking. Anything that I write is a reflection of me trying to do these things. Often, I won’t even know what I want to write about until I actually begin. For instance, I recently started on a piece that was supposed to be about time—the passage of it, my anxiety over the passage of it, and so forth. As I began writing, it became clear that what I really wanted to write about was my grandmother who passed away eight years ago, and more specifically, about the time just before her death. The focus of the piece shifted from time in general to a certain time in my life when my grandmother was about to die. I suppose there was a part of me that needed to understand this experience more, to give it a shape.
How does your writing process work?
Write, rewrite, rewrite, rewrite, and on and on and on, until I arrive at something I feel mostly satisfied with, which chances are I will rewrite again at some point. I’m an incredibly slow writer. Once or twice the stars have aligned and I nailed a good portion of something on my first try, but this is usually not my experience. Virginia Woolf describes her sentences as having been “struck with an axe out of crystal.” I think this image is about perfect. This is how writing feels for me much of the time. Despite the arduous nature of it—or perhaps because of it—I derive immense pleasure from striking my axe again and again and, ultimately, this is why I do it. If I did not enjoy it, there is no way it would be worth my time.
I write six to seven days a week for about an hour and a half. This happens in the mornings, after getting my kids off to school, and on the weekends, while they are watching cartoons. Having this kind of a schedule, where writing is built into my day, right alongside eating and brushing my teeth, works really well for me.
I would also have to consider reading to be a part of my process, because I find that my writing is profoundly influenced by what I read. It’s to the point that I have to be thoughtful about what I pick up. Annie Dillard says that a writer must be “…careful of what he reads, for this is what he will write,” and I agree with that statement wholeheartedly. I have no set schedule for reading; I simply do it whenever I can. I don’t like watching television, so there is time to read most evenings, after I’ve put the kids to bed.
I’m very excited to introduce two writers I adore, Jessica Braun and Julie Burton, who will be sharing their answers to these same questions next week:
Jessica Braun is a writer, erstwhile yoga teacher and mom to two girls. She does most of her writing on yellow Post-it notes while driving or making dinner, many of which end up stuck to the bottom of someone’s sock. She lives in a suburb of Philadelphia and blogs at www.nocigarettesnobologna.com.
Julie Burton is an experienced writer specializing in any and all aspects of parenting, relationships and finding balance. She is a wife and mother of four children ranging in age from 10 to 19, and soon-to-be author of a self-care book for mothers. She has been writing ever since she can remember and her children have provided her with some of her most treasured material. She blogs at www.unscriptedmom.com.
And my lovely friend Amy, whom you met at the beginning of this post…
A self-described closet writer who surprised herself by making the decision to dip a toe into the blogosphere this year, Amy VanEchaute lives in Illinois with her husband, Jeff. Together, they’ve raised three (splendidly) literate children. Amy studies and reveres nature, subsists on poetry, and chooses peace for her daily portion. She enjoys sharing her photos and her perspective on My Path with Stars Bestrewn.